My Decision Was Final...Until I Changed It.

I didn't want to do it.

I wasn't going to do it.

No one could make me do it.

And nothing was going to change my mind.

This used to be my attitude toward being on the worship team in my youth group. With as much as I loved singing, I hated being on stage in front of people and there was no way I was going to do it. Even though, every year for the past three years, I slowly warmed up to the idea, each year I continued to reject the opportunity because my stubborn nature refused to let me do otherwise.

Well, this year, my senior year, I'm finally going to join the team. And I'm super excited about it.

Why? Well, after being on the band for the Canada mission trip, I realized that singing in front of a bunch of people isn't as bad as I was expecting. It's still not my favorite thing to do. I definitely prefer singing in the shower or in my bedroom where no one can hear me. However, I love singing. And after I got over the anxiety of singing in front of a bunch of people, I actually enjoyed myself. A lot.

And then, I got to thinking. And I came to three conclusions:

1. I love singing. Seriously. It might be my favorite thing to do. Like, ever. 
2. The people that are on the worship band is a great group of kids. Way better than some of the friends I've had in the past. And, as I discovered hanging out with this group in Canada, they're a ton of fun. Definitely a bonus. :-)
3. This is what God wants me to do. He gave me a gift that for years I've been hiding. This is how I can best serve him.

I guess, somewhere deep down inside of me, I've always known all this. But, I'd made such a big deal out of NOT doing the band, I could never bring myself to admit that I should.  But, that doesn't matter to me anymore, because seriously...how can I not do it after realizing all this? It's a win-win-win situation.

Seriously, I wish I'd thought of this three years ago!