Saturday in the Park (Unintentionally).

Okay, so in the past three days so much craziness has happened, I'm going to have to split it up into a few different posts. But let's start with this afternoon.

I had quite the adventure.

I went to lunch with a couple of friends and had a great time. The craziness started when I was trying to leave.

I had parked in a parking garage to the left of a big concrete column. As I was leaving, I needed to go right. For those of you playing at home, that means that as I was backing out I was turning toward the column. Do you see where this is going?

I was looking left to make sure no cars were coming while I was backing out and turning right. As I turned my head to look right, I noticed how close I was to the column. But what I didn't realize was that I had not yet cleared it. I thought, That was close! and kept going. Half a second later I heard the screeching sound of my car scraping against the column.

Not knowing what to do, I then stopped backing out and went forward instead. My car screeched again as it scraped the column once more in the opposite direction. I straightened out my car and continued backing out, thankfully clearing the pole this time. And then I exited the parking garage, hoping the damage wasn't horrible.

As I was exiting the garage, I got confused about which way I was going and, though it really didn't matter, accidentally chose the more difficult way. Which I realized as soon as I turned, but it was too late so I was going with it. I knew what to do, so it wasn't a big deal.

Except I got distracted and missed the street I was supposed to turn on. Naturally, I assumed I could turn on the next street and it would lead me to the same place. Naturally, I was wrong.

I ended up on a weird street and was briefly concerned that it was going to lead me off a cliff. Instead, it led me to a park.

Side note: I have been to this park before but have never driven myself. It is across the river from where I work and I have always wondered how to get there. Now that I have figured it out...I really doubt I could do it again. Probably not even with a map.

Anyway, I pulled over in the park to gather my thoughts and come up with a game plan and check out the damage on my car and respond to a text message. My car looked like this:

Which was a lot better than I had imagined. So it's no big deal.

Anyway. This park is really confusing. Like, it has a bazillion roads to choose from. I wasn't sure what to do so I just went straight. I followed the road a little ways but it just led me to a dead end. So I turned around and turned onto a street that had this sign:

This photo is from google. I am not so crazy as to stop and take a picture of a sign just 

because I am already writing the blog post in my head.

I have no idea what this sign means. I have a vehicle and I'm pretty sure it has a motor...does that mean I drive a motorized vehicle? Wouldn't a de-motorized vehicle, like, not move? Confusing.

But there was a stop sign just up ahead facing me, and why would they have a stop sign if cars weren't allowed there? I decided that I was not in fact driving a motorized vehicle (even though I'm still convinced my car does have a motor) and that it was okay for me to proceed. I came to a turning point so I picked a direction and turned. I was sad for a minute because it led me to yet another dead end, but then I realized that there was an exit!! That led to a street!! That led to another street from which I knew how to get home!!!!

Oh, and I forgot to mention that I was below empty on gas this whole time. And unfortunately there are no gas stations in the park.

Maybe that wasn't as crazy as I made it sound but it felt pretty crazy to me. Sometimes I don't even know how I manage to be so...I don't even know what the word is. Me. That's the word. So me.

And what will I be like when I'm 30? I'm sort of afraid to find out.

Stay tuned...

And the Curse Continues.

So I bought a Mac last week. Because Macs are supposed to be top of the line and you know that's what I need with my technological issues.

Oh, but I am still having technological issues. I bought the Microsoft Office for Mac 2011 Home & Student software and, well, it wouldn't work. So, I called a number that Best Buy gave me in order to fix the problem.

And this is (more or less) the conversation I had with Microsoft:
_____________________________________________________

Automated Voice: Hello, welcome to Microsoft. Do you have your set up wizard open on your computer?

Me: Yes.

Automated Voice: Please say or enter your product installation number. The product installation number is a long number set apart in different groups. Please read me the first group of numbers.

Me: MQBY9

Automated Voice: I'm sorry, I didn't catch that. Please say "try again" or "transfer to a live person."

Me: Try again.

Automated Voice: Transferring to a live person.

(This is where I hung up the first time. I did not want to talk to a live person. I wanted to enter my number and get the thing activated. However, the scenario above was repeated about five times before I finally decided that a live person would be more helpful.)

Tech Support: (In a very thick Arab accent) Welcome to Apple Tech Support, jdkafjdhafhda fjakfjaklsfjds?

Me: Uh...I'm sorry, can you say that again?

Tech Support: Welcome to Apple Tech Support, what is ffdjaklfjdkalfjdasklfjkalfjldfjfauriof?

Me: I'm sorry, I'm having trouble understanding you. One more time?

Tech Support: Welcome to Apple Tech Support, what product fkdajkdajl calling about jfldkajfla?

Me: What product am I calling about?

Tech Support: Yes.

Me: Microsoft Office for Mac 2011 Home & Student software.

Tech Support: And what is the problem?

Me: The PIN number I need to obtain the product key in order to activate my software is not activated. The store from which the software came gave me this number to call to activate the PIN.

Tech Support: Please read me the PIN number.

Me: *reads PIN number*

Tech Support: That is the product key.

Me: But it says right here, in big letters, "THIS IS NOT YOUR PRODUCT KEY."

Tech Support: It is the product key.

Me: Okay....

(I enter the PIN number where I am supposed to enter the product key).

Me: It says the product key is not valid.

Tech Support: Please hold.

(Two minutes later...)

Tech Support: Thank you for holding. Do you currently have an internet connection?

Me: Yes.

Tech Support: Please turn off your internet connection.

Me: (confused) Okay....

Tech Support: Now enter your product key.

Me: You mean the number I gave you a few minutes ago?

Tech Support: Yes.

Me: (even more confused) Okay...

(I enter the number again, not sure how turning off the internet will have helped).

Me: It still says it's invalid.

Tech Support: Let me transfer you to customer service.

(Five minutes later...)

Customer Service: What product are you calling about?

(Side note: This guy was easier to talk to. Because the other guy didn't understand what I was saying and I didn't understand what he was saying because he doesn't speak very good English and I don't speak very good Arab.)

Me: Microsoft Office for Mac 2011 Home & Student software.

Customer Service: And what is the problem?

Me: My PIN number says it hasn't been activated and I can't get the product key to activate my software without it.

Customer Service: What is your PIN number?

Me: *reads PIN number*

Customer Service: It says this PIN has not been activated.

Me: Yes...I just said that...

Customer Service: Please hold.

(Five minutes later...)

Customer Service: Thank you for holding. This PIN has not been activated. It can only be activated at the store from which it was purchased. If the product key was not activated, we could help you with that. But we have a deal with all the stores that they are the only ones who can activate the PIN. You will need to contact them to activate your PIN.

Me: (frustrated) Okay....

Customer Service: Thank you and have a nice day.

Me: Thank you....?
____________________________________________________

I should also mention that I don't think I was even talking to someone in the United States, considering that both of them were clearly Middle Eastern (judging by the accents) and I called at 10:30 at night when everywhere in the United States is closed. And he told me to have a nice day. I was about to go to bed.

Not that there's anything wrong with non-Americans...it's just A LOT easier to talk to someone who, you know, speaks the same language as you...

So, after wasting 30+ minutes on the phone with these people...and found out nothing that was helpful...I went to bed, extremely frustrated.

We are going to Best Buy to exchange the software. Hopefully the new one will work better.

And, to answer the question that everyone was wondering: No, the highest quality laptop you can possibly buy is apparently NOT the answer to the curse that technology has thrust upon me.

But, I should have known. Something about my Mac had to be Kayla deficient, and I think I found the lucky winner.

The Binder Dilemma.

Over the years, there has been one school item that I have spent more money on than any other school supply. Paper, pencils, you name it. None can compare to the unfathomable amount of money I have invested in binders.

Typically people buy one binder a year, right? Not me. No, I have to buy at least two. My freshman year I had to buy three.

Why? Well, for one thing, binders break on me ALL THE TIME. Almost every binder I have ever owned has in some way deteriorated. I've had covers fall off, rings refuse to close, rings refuse to open, rips and tears, zippers falling off...you name it, it's happened. Not just to the cheap plastic ones, either. My horrible experience with binders includes those fancy, expensive, "durable" cloth zipper binders.

And when my binders don't break, something else happens to them. They tend to vanish.

Not kidding. Last year, around November, I put my backpack and my binder in my trunk before my last class. Apparently, my backpack had gotten caught in the door and the trunk didn't close all the way. I didn't know that, however, so after my last class, I got into my car and drove off. Somewhere along the way I noticed my door ajar light was on. Immediately I wondered if it was my trunk, because I remembered it may not have shut all the way. Sure enough, that was it.

The trunk was still mostly closed, so I was going to wait until my destination to shut it. Well, on the way, I hit a huge bump in the road and the trunk flew open, at which point I pulled over and shut the trunk.

The next day, I couldn't find my binder anywhere. I looked EVERYWHERE. It was gone. Then I remembered the trunk incident, and decided that my binder was not coming back. So I bought a new one.

Well, this new one has now lasted almost a year. Which, I should know, is always a bad sign. My binders NEVER go this long without breaking or disappearing.

Today, it was gone.

I had no idea where it went.

I woke up this morning, and it was sitting right where it should be, next to my backpack. I went downstairs with my backpack and (I thought) my binder. Got in the car. Went to school. Put my books in my classroom. No binder.

Naturally, I assume I left it in the car. So I go check. No binder.

Okay...I must have left it at home then. So during my break I go home. I check the living room. No binder.

I check my bedroom. No binder.

I check the bathroom, under my bed, the car once more.

No binder.


Really??? Again? How does a binder just vanish?

The funny thing is, it's actually the same binder that fell out of the trunk. Well, not exactly the same. But the same type. I was lucky enough to find the exact same binder--on clearance, and the last one in stock at that--when I went to go buy a new one last year.

I was about to give up on binders, when miraculously my binder reappeared...under the passenger seat in the car...where I had already looked...TWICE.

Seriously though, I'm never buying another binder again. Maybe I'll have better luck with folders.

Computers Should Fear Me.

I swear I am not technologically challenged.

I'm normally pretty good with computers and the like. I'm good at figuring out how electronics work. But lately, I've been having MAJOR issues.

It all started on Monday. Oh, don't you just love Mondays that start out with nothing going right? Those are the best, no?

Yeah...no. I come into work Monday morning and attempt to log on to my computer. I enter my username. Fine. I enter my password. Okay. It says what it always says: Verifying password, please wait...

Normally this "verifying" takes about 5 seconds tops, and then I'm logged on. Yeah...I waited about 5 minutes. Then I entered my password again. Still nothing. Then, about 2 minutes later, the screen went black. Finally something is happening.

Then: No, wait, nevermind. It's making me log in again. Okay, not a big deal. So I enter my username. Fine. I enter my password. Verifying password, please wait...

FIVE MORE MINUTES.

Forget this. I'm rebooting. So I turn off my computer. I turn it back on. It starts up. And then it just stops. It gives me some error message. I don't understand, because I don't read computer. But it tells me to press F1 to retry boot. So I press F1. Nothing. I press it again. Nothing. I press it about 50 more times. Nothing.

Okay...let's try this again, shall we? Turn off computer. Turn on computer. Error message. F1. Nothing.

I literally had like 3 people trying to fix the problem. I have no idea what happened, but my computer just did not want to let me on.

Finally they decided to have me log onto another computer to see if I could get on that one. So, my friend and coworker logged off and I logged into hers. BAM. It let me in. Success. So I log out. And then her screen goes black. AND NOTHING IS WORKING ON HER COMPUTER ANYMORE.

Seriously??? Does everything I touch break? Like some sort of twisted version of King Midas? 

Thankfully, her computer started back up just fine. And then, magically, so did mine. I was very glad that my computer was working again, albeit I had lost an hour of work.

And I thought that was the end of my computer problems. But then yesterday, I was trying to log onto another computer (not at work--this was at church), and everything froze.

It's highly possible that it locked me out for entering too many wrong passwords. I didn't know the password so I kept guessing...I had no idea it would just stop letting me guess...I mean, I would have gotten it eventually.

I felt like the computer was taunting me. It was probably all "Haha, you don't know the password and you suck at guessing...and I'm a cool computer and have the power to just freeze on you and make you panic and think that you've broken yet another computer..."

Yeah. It was so laughing at me.

In conclusion. If you are or have a computer, be very afraid if I am near. Bad things happen when I touch computers. Horrible, terrible, awful things.

No wonder my laptop has so many issues...