It Goes Both Ways.

This morning, after having a conversation with a few friends about being an introvert, I found myself once again thinking about how extroverts just don't understand introverts.

I know all you introverts out there have complained about it. Because it's true. They just don't understand. I can't tell you how many times I have sent my extroverted friends links to articles explaining how introverts are wired (and there are PLENTY of them, probably because writers tend to be introverted). And I'm sure I'm not the only one.

But then I stopped myself. And I thought, Wow, I sure complain about extroverts a lot and how they don't understand me. But you know what? I don't understand them either. I wonder how often they complain about me?

It's so true, though.

 

Sometimes I feel like extroverts think their subdued friends carry a scarlet letter. Like introversion is a disease. Like there's something seriously wrong with introverts and we need to be fixed. And that just isn't true. There's nothing wrong with being an introvert.

But that doesn't mean we're perfect.

Just because extroverts don't understand us does not make us the victim. But it also doesn't mean we need to educate them on how they should treat us. It's not our job to fix others; it's our job to fix ourselves.

So I did a google search on "how to understand extroverts." And I learned some new things about my outgoing peers that I never realized before. And now I see that while there are definitely things that come more natural to them than to us, overall, they don't have it any easier than we do.

Extroverts cannot change us into one of them. And likewise, we can't change them into one of us. But what we can do is change how we relate to them. Because just like introverts want extroverts to treat them a certain way, extroverts want introverts to treat them a certain way.

Here are some articles about extroverts that I thought were really helpful:

5 Myths About Extroverts that Need to Die | Unfettered Ink
The Care and Feeding of Your Extrovert | The Badger's Sett
Understanding Extroverts: The Survival Guide | My Super Charged Life
Pickles' Guide to Understanding Extroverts | The Shadows Keep on Coming

Extroverts, if you guys want to learn a little bit more about how to relate to introverts, here is one of my all time favorite articles about introverts. As a fellow introvert, I can vouch for the validity of his post. Take good notes; there may be a pop quiz.

10 Myths About Introverts | Carl Kingdom

Keep in mind that everyone is different, so I'm sure none of these points apply to every extrovert/introvert in existence. They should more serve as a guide to better understanding.

And remember, just because we can't change what comes natural to us doesn't mean we can't choose to do it anyway. The choice is always there, we just have to make it.

My New...Uh, Hobby?

Several months ago, it finally hit me that I am a senior. That virtually everything I do this year will be my last time ever doing it. And then, upon pondering this thought some more, I realized that this meant that once volleyball season ended, I would never play another sport again, or have any way at all of staying in shape.

Well, I decided that this was unacceptable. I must have some way to burn calories, or I will get fat. And I'm not changing the way I eat. I love sugar too much. No, I needed something that would simply balance out the effects of my bad eating habits.

I considered my different options. I wanted something that wouldn't cost me any money, and something that I could do on my own time and at my own pace. I came to the conclusion that running was my best option.

Seems like a very logical solution, right? Ha! You're forgetting one very, very important thing about me: 

I DON'T RUN.

More than that, I don't like running. In fact, I don't normally like exercising in general. I'm not athletic. I'm more of an arts person. The only reason I stuck with volleyball all these years was because I actually (most of the time) enjoyed it, and it was a way of working off all those chocolate milkshakes I eat (drink?).

Seriously, almost everyone (okay...everyone) who knows me was really shocked when I told them I was going to start running, and super impressed that I haven't given up yet.

Of course, if you're expecting me to give up, then you're forgetting another very important thing about me: 

I'M NOT A QUITTER.

So, I'm going to stick with it. Volleyball ended last week, and so far, I've run 4 days. The third day I ran my maximum: 2.5 miles. I discovered I can run a mile in about 10 minutes, which I never knew. I also discovered that I can run (at least) 25 minutes without stopping. Next time I think I'll go for 3 miles in 30 minutes. I'm seriously surprising myself. If you'd asked me two weeks ago, I would have thought I'd be dead WAY before I got to this point.

Oh, yeah. And the great thing about running is I can drink (eat?) chocolate milkshakes now totally guilt-free. I often reward myself with one after my runs.

My Decision Was Final...Until I Changed It.

I didn't want to do it.

I wasn't going to do it.

No one could make me do it.

And nothing was going to change my mind.

This used to be my attitude toward being on the worship team in my youth group. With as much as I loved singing, I hated being on stage in front of people and there was no way I was going to do it. Even though, every year for the past three years, I slowly warmed up to the idea, each year I continued to reject the opportunity because my stubborn nature refused to let me do otherwise.

Well, this year, my senior year, I'm finally going to join the team. And I'm super excited about it.

Why? Well, after being on the band for the Canada mission trip, I realized that singing in front of a bunch of people isn't as bad as I was expecting. It's still not my favorite thing to do. I definitely prefer singing in the shower or in my bedroom where no one can hear me. However, I love singing. And after I got over the anxiety of singing in front of a bunch of people, I actually enjoyed myself. A lot.

And then, I got to thinking. And I came to three conclusions:

1. I love singing. Seriously. It might be my favorite thing to do. Like, ever. 
2. The people that are on the worship band is a great group of kids. Way better than some of the friends I've had in the past. And, as I discovered hanging out with this group in Canada, they're a ton of fun. Definitely a bonus. :-)
3. This is what God wants me to do. He gave me a gift that for years I've been hiding. This is how I can best serve him.

I guess, somewhere deep down inside of me, I've always known all this. But, I'd made such a big deal out of NOT doing the band, I could never bring myself to admit that I should.  But, that doesn't matter to me anymore, because seriously...how can I not do it after realizing all this? It's a win-win-win situation.

Seriously, I wish I'd thought of this three years ago!